When do you know

Sorry to hear this. It's the worst part of having a pet, as I'm sure others will chime in to say.

The not eating thing is not good, and may take the decision out of your hands. I don't know what size your dog is, but mine went from 60 pounds to 42 within days it seemed (no cancer--she just stopped eating). If she won't eat, parts don't get nutrition, and things start shutting down.

Consult with your vet--someone who knows your dog well and can make the judgement options clear (because, as with any emotional decision, you may not be thinking as clear as you intend to). My breaking point has always been either (a) not eating for many days in a row or (b) inability to control bowels anymore. I have consulted my vet several times. Sometimes they send you home, sometimes they gently suggest it's time.

I've never had a dog that I knew was in great pain at the end, so I couldn't tell you about that scenario. Some people say they look at you as if to ask you to "fix it" and it's a look you will know when you see it.

Good luck.

Sorry to hear that Ryan. We had a collie that lost his sight, got confused and starting to run into trees. His quality of life was not good. You want to be there for them but you can’t 24/7. I waited too long and took 2 weeks to make a decision. He was a mess – and I was afterword.

Sorry, Ryan, about your dog and the decision you are facing. It sounds like she is at the end of a very full and good life. She lived this long because you took such good care of her. She needs you now to make the right decision. Only you know when that is. If she has stopped eating, that is not a good sign, particularly treats and table scraps. Wish you well at this most difficult time.

So sad to hear this, Ryan. Agreed with the above that your vet is the best advice source: your vet will be able to tell the quality of life your dog enjoys now, and whether (or when) it is time to say goodbye.

You might consider having a metabolic workup, as it is possible that a condition like hypothyroidism could be at play (just throwing out an example, not making an Internet diagnosis). Some conditions like the above can be easily treated at a low monthly pharmaceutical cost, and you might be amazed at how much difference levothyroxine can make in such a dog.

Oh, Ryan. You know what? You just don't know. I can share my experience with my last dog, if that might help. He had been ill for some time, and had me doing the Herculean effort to maintain some quality of life: IV fluids and drugs at home (didn't want him to be in a strange place overnight), daily vet visits, cooking fresh lamb and rice for a pure diet. He showed some vim and vigor on occasion, so I held out hope for recovery. I also saw some quality of life in his existence (he still got annoyed when a squirrel or bunny appeared in his territory.) His favorite day trip was a walk at Wildwood. The day we drove to Wildwood and he wouldn't get out of the car was the day I knew it was time to let him be at peace. Wildwood was his acid test: if he felt so poorly that deer and squirrel and possum and raccoon and whoknowswhat scents didn't excite him, it was time for me to say "thank you for letting me love you, buddy.... rest well." Hope this helps, Ryan. I know your heart hurts, but I also believe you can do what is right for your furry friend. Good thoughts from me to you.

Oh, Ryan I am so sorry. I can only say this about the dogs we've lost over the years, don't keep them too long because you can't bear to let go. I know it's hard. Real hard. Not eating is a signal. Get her to the vet. Let them tell you if there is a reasonable expectation of any quality of life. Then you'll know what to do.

Sorry to hear Ryan. Sounds like you've been a good pack leader/dad :)

It's hard to see loved ones, animal or human get older. Hopefully when he goes it'll be peacefully. There was a thread here before that mentioned finding a vet who would put them to sleep at home. Might have to dig that up.

I agree with everyone else that not eating isn't a good sign and that the animal should be taken to a vet.

That's how it started with our Aussie, and then it got so bad we had to literally had to carry her up and down the stairs to go outside. We finally took her to the vet and she had cancer. The vet gave us some pain killers so she could come home and everyone could say goodbye, and then the next day we had her put to sleep.

Heartfelt sympathy, Ryan. Dogs. We love them. So much it hurts when the inevitable difference in our longevities looms. I'll chime in with a good vet check. Will also chime in that failure to eat is a Big Sign (but then, perhaps your vet can determine some easily solved reason for this). Your pooch is fairly old, as was the last pooch we had to euthanize (14 years old, deaf, blind, fast losing mobility and any trace of zest whatsoever). Our vet helped A LOT by giving her one final exam before euthanization, and we were truly greatly relieved to learn that, indeed, her organs were clearly shutting down. It was time. Whatever the case for your pup, you clearly have the dog's well-being uppermost in your mind -- bravo to you for that.

Thanks everyone. We have been to the vet numerous times over the last 6 months. Her heart and lungs always "sound great" so its definitely old age. I understand my vets reluctance to tell me what to do. The weird thing is my dog has her adrenalin going at the vet so it is hard to explain fully what she is like at home. Currently she is sleeping on a big ol' doggie pillow in another room with labored breathe. Thank you so much for all your posts. I know I need to let her go and save her from pain, it is just a very hard thing to do. Dogs are one of the most amazing things.

Damn, Ryan, I feel for ya. I don't have much advice, as it's not a situation I have faced, but I can't imagine the hardship. Sorry to hear about these events.

It's a very personal decision and a tough one. Only you can tell exactly how your pet's behavior has changed. If you feel that the quality of life has been reduced so much that comfort has been affected, then it's time to consider all options.
As long as you love your pet and put it's comfort level first in your considerations, your decision will be the right one.
While we haven't exactly seen eye to eye on here, I do still have compassion for you in this situation. Good luck.

Very sorry, Ryan. I had a 16-year-old dog for about a month last year. While she was very energetic for the first two weeks, her health started declining a bit. She started looking confused, and didn't want to walk much. I'd take her outside to go to the bathroom, then she would climb into her dog bed and sleep much of the day. The day before she died, she looked so sad in her bed. And I got "the look." She just wasn't happy, probably very uncomfortable with her illnesses. And she had stopped eating. The next day, she collapsed and probably suffered a stroke. As I rushed her to the vet, her whole body was limp, though she was still breathing. I wouldn't want that for you, Ryan, because although she took it out of my hands, for the most part, it was hard for me to see her like that at the end. The fact that your dog has stopped eating tells me she is very near the end. I am sorry you have to go through the pain of losing your girl. I'm sure she appreciates all the love and care you've given her over the years and probably wants you to know it's okay to let her go. I think you'll know when the time is right. Peace.

Hey that sucks, I've had to let a couple of good pets go and it's never easy.

This is just too sad to type about without tears.....sounds like it's time. It is much better for the both of you to do it sooner rather than later. Soo sad and I can feel all that heaviness in your heart. xo

Ryan, I am so sorry to hear about your beloved friend. It sounds as if she has been a good companion to you, and you've been loving and good to her right back.

We had a nearly identical situation some years ago with my schnoodle. She was 16 when we had her put down, but I think it was a blessing to her. She had always been quite the lady, and I know she couldn't stand the indignities of her old age.

Not a day goes by that I don't think of her, and it's been five years.

Its a tough decision Ryan.
All I have to offer the last time we lost a dog. She was having seizures on and off for a week of so. We took her to the vet, got meds, but she never got any better. In the end - I regretted not having her put down sooner. She suffered 2 long days more than she should have - because I was trying to get her 'better'. Lesson learned.

Sending you strength & courage that you make the right decision.

Sorry to hear you're going through this, Ryan.

You will find the courage to do what needs to be done when it is time.

Just please be with her for her final journey. She needs you to feel safe. It is hard to see "it" done, but being there is the last, and perhaps the most important, gift you will ever give your pet.

Almost two years to the date we put our first pet, a smart and friendly black lab to sleep. We wrestled with the decision for the last six months and then he had started to lose his balance when walking and would sit until helped.

On reflection a few years later - The day we took him to the vet was extremely sad and the whole time I felt like I was almost doing something immoral even though I knew it was right. Today I know it was the nicest, most loving gift I could give my friend. I feel for you. It does get better over time too, my thoughts today are all on the goofy quirks that dog had and he still makes me laugh.

In tears over here. I feel so bad for you Ryan. You will know it is time when your heart tells you it is time. Take a day or two to just hug and love on your dog. It is a very hard thing to face but you will know what to do and when it is time to do it. God bless you

"Just please be with her for her final journey. She needs you to feel safe. It is hard to see "it" done, but being there is the last, and perhaps the most important, gift you will ever give your pet."

I wholeheartedly agree with jmleong. It's hard, but I wouldn't have it any other way to be able to comfort my pet while it leaves this world. Good luck, Ryan, whatever you decide.

I had to "make the decision" for 3 dogs. The last one was the toughest because I'm still not convinced he was ready, even though the vet advised. I'll just echo jmleong's advice of being there with her. I wasn't with my last best friend, and still regret it. By the way...2/10 = 1/5 - just saying:-)

I've had to go through this. I played tough guy until she went into cardiac arrest. Then I found that I wasn't so tough after all. When they stop eating, there's only one logical end to it: Cardiac arrest.

If you're just sitting there thinking that the dog will start eating again, don't do that. Don't make the same mistake I did. Accept what's going to happen. In my case, she entered a coma for 4 hours before the arrest, so I guess that I got lucky and she really didn't suffer in the end. Or maybe I'm still just lying to myself.

What I hate is that we can't euthanize our own pets ourselves. Finding alternative substances and dosages is very, very hard.

More sympathy for you, Ryan. I've only been in your shoes with a cat... but I sincerely feel for you. We were in the same boat with not knowing when. But when we knew, we knew. It was rough but we recovered, and you will too.

I knew, when my cats' rear legs no longer worked, and he pulled himself along the carpet with his front legs. I made the appointment for the next day. The day before, I took off work and spent all day with him. He still had an appetite so I fed him some beef tenderloin, and some of his favorite cat treats, as much as he wanted. I cleaned up a couple messes since he no longer could use the litterbox. In the morning I took him to the vet, and held him when the Vet did his thing. He went limp, and it was finally over. Just before the Vet came in with the syringe, I whispered to my cat, when I die, I wanted him to be the first one to greet me.

"Just please be with her for her final journey. She needs you to feel safe. It is hard to see "it" done, but being there is the last, and perhaps the most important, gift you will ever give your pet."
I heartily agree...
You will know when it is time,in her own way she will tell you. Not eating is one of the first signals. Putting my girl to sleep was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life . Just be there with her when her time comes.
You have my deepest and most sincere sympathies.

I agree with you GZ. Years ago my Mom OD'd our 16 yr old Manchester on Valium. Might be hard to do with a larger dog.

Sorry about your dog Ryan. I had an Australian Shepard I took to be euthanized and played Rod Stewart Unplugged in the car on the way to the Vet. Waltzing Matilda was appropriately playing by the time we arrived. Every time I hear that song now I'm reminded of that day.

Another poster has mentioned this, Ryan, and I also remember reading somewhere that there is at least one vet in the area who will come to your house and ease your much-loved pet through her transition. I'm so sorry I don't remember more than that, but perhaps someone reading this on ToledoTalk with a younger memory knows....?

If not, maybe even your vet could tell you which other vet(s) in town offer this kindness.

Wishing you and your sweet dog all the best.

We had to make this decision in the late summer for our beloved dog who was just shy of 15 y/o. He began sleeping more, needing to be by me more, looking confused, and having accidents (which was extremely out of character).

I was so proud of my sons who are in middle and elementary school who asked if they could be there with us and him when "it" was done. I look at being there with him as the final gift of love and companionship that we gave to him for all the years of love and companionship he gave to us.

Sorry you are going through this.

Thankd everyone for all the advice and well wishes. I ended up taking the next day off to spend on the couch with my girl napping. Me and my other dog spent the night on the floor in front of the couch so she knew we were there. The next morning we went in and it was fast and painless. I know that I did the right thing, yet there are still weird conflicting feelings. I am sure those are natural. I did what I could for her at the time I thought was appropriate and I am sure she is very thankful. I woulnd't wish this on an enemy, but it is worth it to be able to spend all those years with a dog, they really are amazing animals. Thanks again.

Having been through the same thing myself, I can tell you that it's never easy and it never gets any easier. The one and only downside to owning a dog is that we are likely to outlive them.

I'm glad you had your nice dog, and I'm sorry that you had to have her put away. Given your description about her condition I'm sure you did the right thing.

Maybe better we outlive them than they outlive us. An aged pet we loved could end up at the Humane Society via the executor of our will unless we make plans for it. Often the family member who said they would take care of our pet "takes care of it" in a most unexpected way.

So sorry for you Ryan but I am glad you were able to be there with her in the end. I know that was a great comfort to her.

GZ, my brother-in-law has put all his animals to sleep when they got too old. He used ether (I think), and has done it to a couple of dogs and a cat. I could not do it myself, but money is so tight for them that the cost of having a vet do it is not in their budget. The last thing the animal feels is the hand of its owner petting it as it goes into unconsciousness. To me, far better than having an animal in a strange place with unfamiliar smells being handled by a stranger.

Putting down my dog was one of the hardest things I ever did. Not looking forward to doing it again, as one of my "girls" is getting up there in age and has slowed down quite a bit.

Ryan, don't ever doubt that you did the right thing. And your staying with her, while difficult, was a wonderful gift to her.

Sure, it's conflicting. You feel like you've spent the last 13-1/2 years promoting her life and now you're ending it. But that's not really the case. Her life was ending, with or without you. You choose to focus on the fact that you wanted her to have the best quality of life. And so you did. She was a lucky dog Ryan. Remember the good times.

Thank you for taking such good care of her, Ryan. It is the hardest decision a pet owner has to make, but you put her needs above your own. What a wonderful life she must have had, being taken care of by you. As holland said, she was a lucky dog.

Knowing all of that doesn't make it easier. A loss is still a loss. I think sometimes, we humans try to talk ourselves out of grieving for a pet, but they are still family members. So, make sure you allow yourself to grieve. Sending good thoughts your way...

Ive gone thru this twice in the last 3 years, and my heart still hasnt healed for either of them. but I still did the right thing.

the call is yours, but for me I had to ask myself if I was in that shape, would I be ready to go. The hard part of this isnt on the dog, it's very peaceful for them. The pain is ours.

Sorry to hear of your loss. She's in a better place. I'm sure you have conflicted feelings, but it's good she didn't suffer long. You did the right thing! Most importantly, you were there with her at the end.

Rest in peace, dear girl. You were loved and will never be forgotten.

Ryan, you are in my thoughts. I am sorry for your loss.